I have a new boyfriend/best friend!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I'm sooo excited it's the same guy I was talking about in my other journel...the one who was dubbed sir Channce....OMG soooo much has happened that it's crazy to believe that it all was in the same week...shoot it was all in 3-4 days...I mean...who would have guessed that me and him would be where we are now.......I'm so happy that I can't even write a lot and that's scary lol....he's great.....one of my favorite things he does is that when i'm looking off or have my eyes closed or napping or something he starts to rub my face and he just stares at me and smiles...I LOVE IT....he treats me...like a queen but he doesn't spoil me. I mean...it's just...a great balance...More later....

I spent the whole day with two ppl I really love. One was my girl who is a friend, we'll name her Tracy. The other was my new found bestie, we'll name him Channce. We had a BALL! All day long. Like seriously, today was just great.

I don't even know WHERE to start. Me, Tracy, and Channce were in the car all happy and listening to the radio. I was dancing and stuff cuz I was HYPER. Um, we get to the mall and Channce starts tickling me and stuff lol too funny. Then "Papers" came on (by Usher) and I started to sing it. And I LOVE that song. It always makes me FEEL some kind of emotion. So, I was a little sad after hearing it and Tracy got a little worried but I assured her I was ok. We go jumping around stations and it comes on again and I almost lose it, so Channce see's my eyes gettin cloudy and he pulls my arm til I'm sittin with my back on the seat and he starts rubbing my face and hugging me. I was sooo comforted by it. So after that I laid on the glove box and he started to rub my back and it put me to sleep for a little while. And from there I just kept getting touches here and there. I didn't think anything of it. Then Tracy texted me telling me she thinks that Channce likes me. I told her that it was impossible and he only see's me as a friend. But APPARENTLY when he rubs my face and stuff he gets this really...loving look on his face. BUT if you let her tell it: "IDK, it's just the way his face got when he carresses you...he looked so gentle and...caring" So after an hour and a half we FINALLY get OUT of the car. And I start getting leg and stomach craps...smh...hurt soooooo bad. Anyway, I end up going to sit down and Channce sits next to me and starts to rub my back so I'd feel better. Helped sooo much. And then idk...we just kept touchin each other. Not sexually just casual but it was the most NATURAL thing for me. I didn't feel akward or weird or anything like that. Just felt like....home. So then the guy Tracy likes came by and ended up sitting with us, we call him Twilight. And then I saw 2 co-workers and my boo boo Ashley saved me some food. I smelled it and almost threw up, so I turned my body away from the smell and held my breathe and the next thing I know Channce is rubbing my back and arms. So after a minute or so I turn back around and he's asking me if I'm okay and rubbing my back and stomach...soooo cute. And it's a whole 3minutes and he still worryin about me being sick lol. Even though I told him like twice I'm ok. And Ash walks around and see's him huddled into me and rubbin by stomach and back and she just pauses and her eyes get all big...hilairous. And I choked on my food and Channce started to crack up laughin...and she was like "Is there something I need to know???" and we were just laughing but I told her he's my besti and there's nothing going on so it's all good. Now Channce doesn't like Twilight. And I know this Sooooo. When Twilight came over I wrapped my arms around Channce cuz I know how he gets. And things were going good and then next thing I know he's biting the crap out of my shoulder...He KNOWS thats a no no because it excites me. I get up and walk away and stand by Tracy and Twilight and I move Tracy back to give the evil eyes to Channce and he looks COMPLETELY unrepentent...I go back and sit down and tell him he knows better and he says "you know why I did it". My first guess was cuz of payback but then I remembered Twilight and nodded my head. Anyway, we all keep that up and he gets a call so me, Tracy, and Twilight are talkin about just...relationships and death...and I started crying about Jamal and lean on Channce while he on da phone. So after all that and we all chillin, I decide I want to go to Spencers. Fun right? Uh, definitely. We chillin and chillin and then I see this AMAZING corset...absolutely BEAUTIFUL! So I try it on and man oh man I was sooo happy because even though the first one I tried didn't fit the 2nd one did soooo I bought it...then a cop came in the store. And my eyes went right to Channce lol. That boy is like a bad luck detector....so I grabbed him and was talkin to him and what not to distract him. Then we left the store and we were walking out the mall when he grabbed my hand and held on to it. And I pulled us to a stop when I saw the little store by the exit because I had been really feigning for a Black & Milds...and I was going to but Channce came back in after Twilight and Tracy went out and stared me down. So I asked what and he went all "if i can't you can't. Idk right now what's stressin you, but no smoking" so i suck my teeth(of course) and we walk out. We find Tracy and Twilight and he goes and leans against a light post and started playin wit my sides and stuff and one thing led to another and we were head to head talking, well debating my seeming "need" to take a drag of Twilights cigarette. And he had his arms around me and everything and I told him I was really stressed out, even though I'm happy. He wanted to know what about but I kept waving it off...I didn't want to burden him with it, espcially since I know KNOW it would make him angry...So we all regroup and I take the cigarette from Twilight and Channce is just starig at me. I ask him if he'll be mad and he says yeah if I don't tell him what's going on. So, I lie and tell him nothing and I'm fine and of course he knows I'm lying...of course. So, he does the cute thing and gets in my face, which is turned looking AWAY from him, and he goes "you can't even look me in the face when you say it? really?" so I just stop and take a minute to THINK about what I was about to do...Twilight and Tracy have walked away by now and so I decide to tell him what's going on...I warned him as much as I could that it would anger him...and by the time I was done....he was LIVID...like LIVID...so...we walked back to the truck. When we got inside he took my hand and laid my head on his shoulder and then kissed my forehead....

That was my night with him...and Tracy and Twilight...Tracy thinks Channce likes me...and even though it seems apparent...I won't believe it until HE tells me himself...because I won't get my hopes up for them to crash and burn....not with him...

Today was a great day...seriously. I had a moment of uncertianity and irritation when Leo and his lyin behind cousin came to my job. I didn't talk to them but when I walked over to them I hadn't really seen them so I did a double take and was like "O, Shit...takimushrooms" lol...too funny and then I just kept walking and went about my business and didn't talk to them or look at them the rest of the time they were in the store...And THEN I got a text from my ex...which I didn't even take the time to read until I got home and still haven't responded to (don't plan on responding at all)...I know that seems mean but...If i respond and he don't like how short the answer is or if I say something and he don't like it...he's gonna B@M about me starting drama so I just don't want to contact him at all...It's just...a waste of time to argue when I don't have to even speak or text him...my life is sooo much easier when i don't have to walk on egg shells and make sure I don't mess with his Pride and whateva else makes him act the way he does. So I just kept about my day with a smile on my face and man...work was a BALL...even tho we didn't clock out til like 11:15....SUPER long day man...SUPER...But yeah...I mean...life is going good...very very good...And Pooh Bear is coming home soon!!!!!AHHHHH I can't wait to see him, he's like my bestest buddy ever!

Today is going to be a better day...I'm letting yesterday go with this final writing of it. My ex boyfriend is...well I won't describe him as anything but a manipulator...seriously. And the fact that I'm just seeing it and experiencing it is really hurting/pissing me off. Because he's being really immature and straight up a douche bag about everything. He wrote a note about me and had his friends and this female Angie commenting on it slandering my name. So I responded and told them all plainly that their friend was biased, a liar, and that if they have anything to say to me they have my name and they can message me, and then I told the female to stfu because she was the main one talking about me saying stuff she doesn't even know about. That really pissed me off. This chick doesn't know me from Adam or Eve yet she found a way to call me all sorts of everything and say what I am or/and what I am not...wtf chick you best slow down...so anyway my response for the most part was mature and straight forward, to the point. It left no room for misunderstanding what my intentions were. This...boy comments back and takes everything I said and flips it so that I look desperate to be his friend and makes it seem like I was trying to start drama and be a bitc*.......DUDE really? I wanted to punch him in the face sooo bad when I read his response. I decided that I was going to just delete him because I don't need or want people in my life that act like that...seriously ...its's just immature to the MAX. So I deleted him from my friends and next thing I know my facebook is kicking me off because that....boy HACKED MY FACEBOOK>>>>>>>WTF....are you kidding me? WTF how old are you? I wasn't even worried about him getting on there or I would've been changed my password(which I see I should have done because he's the dishonest type to hack it). I KNEW it was him so I was LIVID...I mean I was sooooo upset it was crazy. I wanted to walk down to his house and seriously punch the crap outta his jaw....because that is sooooo petty man...He texts me and goes "your new facebook password is chantez11, you might want to change it, lol" .....son...really....wtf....he ....man...I'm tellin you lol. He seriously doesn't understand how lucky he is that I am who I am because my ppl wouldn't have put up with that type of bs. This boy up at Bowie JUST got jumped for callin his ex a bitc*...maybe he needs one of those cuz for real da boy is out his rabbit mind...but seriously, I'm not the type to do that bs or I woulda let my Love Pooh bear or my bro Jay and his boys get that tail when he came out the mouth to me wrong...BUT I didn't let that go down cuz I don't do my business that way....but seriously...I'm just astonished that he's so....idiotic...straight up and down. The boy is delusional...seriously. Nobody is going to seriously put up with him like that because nobody wants to feel like I do when he gets like that....its crazy...So that's the sum up of what's happened recently...

I have deleted my ex from my facebook. I'm done for real. I really don't care if in a few months he will be over the whole situation or not over the situation because in all honesty...he's a major manipulator and I really just don't have time for that for real...I just don't have the patience or freaking niceness to deal with that nonsense. No joke. Everything I said or say was being twisted around to mean something else...and the fact that his own "FRIENDS" don't notice how biased and munipulative he is just frustrates me to NO end...it's like they're blind...and that just further proves my point that he has NO real friends...because if they were his real friends then they wouldn't be so quick to call me out my name and say all the bad stuff that they do...nobody else even understands why I put up with the things I did with him...he's called me a bi**4 times. A slut whenever he got mad. A cheater, fast slut, horrible person, sucky friend, and just about everything else...MAN! I'm just so irritated...I'm not even mad its just that people like him just...they make EVERYTHING you say bad and no matter how grown up you try to be he turns it into you being a fool or some other bs...

He JUST hacked my freaking facebook and changed my password...wtf not only that but he freaking texted me and told me what my new password was....WTF man I am .......I am ....LIVID